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Tracking Down Emotional Affairs

posted by PInow.com Staff | January 4th, 2007
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Emotional Affair

Emotional affairs often involve deep friendship and intimacy as well as sexuality, which can lead to real problems if they cause another relationship to form. Tracing and proving this sort of infidelity can be extremely difficult, however.

Emotional affairs are a type of infidelity that usually does not begin with physical intimacy or sex. In fact, by definition, this type of cheating begins with the emotions. Many people assume that cheating must involve physical intimacy, but this type of infidelity can also lead to broken relationships.

What is emotional cheating?

This sort of cheating is often characterized by:

1) Deception and secrecy. Those involved may not tell their partners about the amount of time they spend with each other. An individual involved in this type of affair, for example, may tell his or her spouse that they are staying late at work when they are really meeting with someone else. Even if no physical intimacy occurs, the deception does undermine existing relationships – and clearly shows that those involved think they are doing something wrong. In other words, if there was really no harm in meeting with a friend, both parties would feel comfortable telling their partners the truth about where they are meeting and what they are discussing.

2) Inappropriate emotional intimacy. The partner being unfaithful may spend excessive time with someone of the opposite sex – time that is not being spent with an actual partner. He or she may confide more in their new “friend” than in their partner and may share more intimate emotional feelings and secrets with their new partner than with their existing spouse. Any time that an individual invests more emotionally into a relationship with someone besides their partner, an existing partnership may suffer.

3) Sexual chemistry. Emotional affairs may not lead to physical intimacy, but some do. In most of these affairs, however, an unspoken attraction exists. A partner may spend extra time getting ready to see this new partner or may buy new clothing or change their appearance in order to seem attractive to this new person.

Are emotional affairs a real problem?

Emotional affairs can be as destructive to marriages and partnerships as sexual ones. They create real feelings of betrayal and anger. Whenever a partner is rushing off to meet a new “friend” rather than working on a current relationship, the existing relationship will suffer. Plus, the existing partner will feel extremely hurt if a spouse runs off to share exciting news or problems with someone else. An intimate relationship is where a person usually shares their desires, fears, and victories. When one partner starts sharing these details with someone else first, the relationship starts breaking down.

The problem with emotional affairs

This sort of cheating is very difficult to pin down. Many individuals defend such infidelity simply as “friendship.” There is often little physical evidence – no clearly sexual notes or emails. In many cases, it takes a professional to uncover deception is taking place. A private investigator can gather evidence of lying and can use surveillance to find out how far an affair has gone. It is simple to find this type of professional through the PInow.com Worldwide Directory of Private Investigators. Plus, the PInow.com Worldwide Directory of Private Investigators even offers free infidelity resources that offer real answers.

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Related Articles: Cheating / Infidelity, PInow.com Exclusives

5 Comments

  1. […] Emotional affairs often involve deep friendship and intimacy as well as sexuality, which can lead to real problems if they cause another relationship to form. Tracing and proving this sort of infidelity can be extremely difficult, however.read more | digg story […]

    Pingback by Chat Detective » Blog Archive » Tracking Down Emotional Affairs — January 12, 2007 @ 9:27 am

  2. […] It’s no newsflash: many people cheat. But you don’t have to take your clothes off for another or even touch someone outside your relationship to be unfaithful. I’m talking about “emotional infidelity,” an idea alien to me until recent conversations with some female friends who are in this psychological mess. […]

    Pingback by Investigation News - Emotional infidelity: Does cheating always have to involve sex? - PInow.com Investigator Directory — February 12, 2007 @ 3:45 pm

  3. […] “It’s the one day of the year when a man who’s having an affair is expected to do something romantic for both his wife and his girlfriend,” the Journal-Constitution reports today. “So, like flower shops and restaurants, jewelry stores and greeting card companies, sleuths such as [private investigator Jeanene Weiner] will be busy Wednesday, trying to catch the juggling acts on tape.” […]

    Pingback by Investigation News - Time for the ‘Super Bowl of Surveillance’ - PInow.com Investigator Directory — February 19, 2007 @ 2:34 pm

  4. […] Emotional affairs involve someone who builds an inappropriately intimate relationship with someone outside their partnership. This may mean that a husband suddenly starts confiding all his personal and work-related problems to a female co-worker rather than his wife. It could also mean a wife suddenly confiding all her successes and desires to a new male friend rather than her husband. An emotional affair is usually also marked by secrecy – a partner may downplay or outright lie about the amount of time spent with a new partner. Sexual attraction is almost always part of the equation, too, although it is not always acted upon. […]

    Pingback by Investigation News - How to Tell Whether a Partner is Having an Emotional Affair - PInow.com Investigator Directory — February 23, 2007 @ 6:11 pm

  5. […] In any event, getting the facts straight is always the first step. In rare cases, a partner may be completely honest about their online activities. However, in most cases, a partner will simply see some signs that an online affair is taking place, such as noticing that their other partner is spending a lot of time online, getting very secretive about online activity, and/or withdrawing from the relationship. In all these cases, it is important to find out what is going on. Knowing whether an affair is virtual or in-person, and knowing the scope of the affair, can help bring closure and answers that lead to some concrete decisions. […]

    Pingback by Investigation News - When Does Online Cheating Cross the Line? - PInow.com Investigator Directory — March 6, 2007 @ 4:01 pm

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